[I am most appreciative for permission to post the following essay. To protect her privacy, Serephina is not the author's real name.]

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I first came to GAPS because of two particularly worrying problems, but in addition, I had various other things suggesting to me that my body was not really well as a whole.

For many years I had had, with increasing severity, a condition known as Depersonalisation Syndrome. This can be seen on PET scans, which show that one area of the brain is inactive. The experience of DP for me is that I do not feel awake, but as if I am dreaming, and I have the sense that my brain is not properly comprehending my surroundings, even though I am able to be factually accurate about everything, and to respond to my surroundings in ways that other people find appropriate. Relationships are difficult, since the emotional meaning of situations is difficult to interpret. People and places seem unfamiliar, and I cannot remember how things used to feel when I was well. I don't feel the normal range of emotions, and often feel emotions happening in my body without me connecting to them, as if I am a robot. This experience is frightening and bewildering.

Dear Family,

There's a church near us that just hosted a forum on Supporting Families Dealing With Mental Illness. The announcement read: "Clinical Depression, Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia, and Anxiety Disorders ...one out of five families are affected by these illnesses, and family members need a great deal of support and education in order to help their loved ones. Here in Ithaca, NAMI-FL or the National Alliance on Mental Illness - Finger Lakes Affiliate sponsors a free 12 week Family to Family Course as well as bi-weekly support groups..."

[This is Andrea Fabry's story, in her own words, compiled by me (Sarabeth) from various articles and posts on her website. I am most appreciative that she has given permission for her work to appear here.]

Our family, Chris, Andrea, and 9 children (ages 9-26), moved to Arizona in 2009 to begin a journey of healing following an exposure to toxic mold. Defects in the construction of our 5500-square-foot Colorado home had led to unseen water leaks and resulting high levels of stachybotrys, aspergillus, and penicillum. After two uninsured costly remediation, our health issues remained. We were advised to treat the home like a fire and abandon it and its contents in October 2008.

Losing our home, our pets, our prized possessions, and our cherished memories has been devastating. Recovering our health after ingesting high levels of mold and mycotoxins has been a slow and painful process...

Cara Faus knew that something was wrong by the time her daughter was only four months old. Her baby wasn't making eye contact with anyone, ever, and still wasn't rolling over. Cara and her husband kept checking for baby developmental milestones in the coming months, and started to worry, but they also didn't want to be hasty: everyone knows that babies grow on their own timetables. They hoped that their daughter would soon begin developing more “typically,” or at least more happily, and acquire the skills that people take for granted in “normal” children, like playing.

And anyway, there was _some_ forward progress, and _some_ development. They don't call autism a “learning disability” and a “spectrum disorder” for nothing. Katie (not her real name) finally began crawling at 13 months, and still wasn't playing with talking sounds like other babies. But still, again, some kids talk later, and walk later... How can you possibly be objective about one unique child? Cara found that she finally had to look at the whole picture, in order to notice that it wasn't just a physical milestone which was missing or one issue with her daughter's speech that was concerning, but there was rather an entire developmental breakdown manifesting itself in her child's unique set of symptoms.

Dear Family,

We order cases of “Seventh Generation” toilet paper, partly because it's functional and recycled, partly out of habit (Jeff and I have been buying this brand for over a decade), and and partly because it's nice to only run out of toilet paper every few months. Also, because the wrapper features this great quote:

“In our every deliberation, we must
consider the impact of our decisions
on the next seven generations.”

--From the great law of the Iroquois Confederacy